I figured I should eventually do a NaNoWriMo recap, for all of those who have been asking me this last month how it all went. The answer is... it went well. Ish. Yeah. Something like that.
A little vague? That's mostly because I felt like the whole month was very surreal. But let me start at the beginning.
I began the month with a title, a setting and two sorta-characters and the need for a third one ASAP. The basic premise of the book is: Verona, or V for short, opened a bar with her best friend Craig after getting a surprise inheritance. It's geared towards geeky people, with a whole game room in the back that's set up to hold anything from a Tabletop Night to a LAN Party to an old-school Mario Kart 64 tournament. There's a One Ring bar, complete with the dark runes, a massive TARDIS in one corner, and all sorts of other themed tables and decorations. Themed drinks, food, etc. It's basically heaven for anyone who considers themselves part of a fandom.
All this serves as the backdrop for V to meet tons of people, which is her favorite thing. She has a reputation as a talented matchmaker, often helping regulars get the jumpstart in their relationships. But she has kept herself to a strict no-dating-customers policy, and since she never does anything besides work, she never meets anyone. She's content with just hanging out with Craig, whom she's known since they were 5, and who has been her best and sometimes only friend through thick and thin. And also sorta her boyfriend that one summer but they don't talk about that...
In walks Mo. He's this smooth, David Tennant look-alike, who comes to the bar's big Halloween party and immediately sweeps V off her feet, causing her to throw her rules and caution to the wind and see what happens with this guy... Until it all goes wrong.
Most of this plot I came up with after November had already started, which is not usually how I like to write. I at least like to have the end sorted out before I start, so I have a place I'm going even if I take a different route to get there.
That was the thing with this book. I was more successful than my last attempt to mostly pants a book (for those who are not familiar with NaNo terminology, pantsing is writing without a plan, or "flying by the seat of your pants"). The last time I tried this, it was an unmitigated disaster. I won that month, but just barely, and I still haven't had the guts to go back and read the thing to see what might be salvageable. So at least this year, I think what I wrote has potential. But it's mostly that. Potential.
What actually happened was that I had a pretty good idea and then somehow over the course of the month it became something completely different: a Romance book. *dun dun dun* This was not at all my intention, nor was it really a great direction for the book to take considering the characters. I have this habit of creating awesome characters who are nice and flawed and them making them do things that make no sense, so that everything ties up really nicely. I'm working on it. To be fair to myself, I told myself that I was just doing this month for fun to take a break from last years NaNo novel which I am currently attempting to edit. Still, I was hoping my "just for fun" would include a little more reality than what this ended up with. Whatever.
So that's the recap. I won, and I won a week early because I had some freakishly good writing days. Also the knowledge that my life was probably going to get crazy in December (new job, anyone?) so I should probably get more than a couple of days of recovery time in. This led to the last marathon day that pushed me over the finish line after 7500 words in one day, and also marked the last words I wrote that month because I decided I needed to go sit in a corner and think about what I'd done.
Who knows if this book will ever see the light of day. I'm thinking it will, after some pretty heavy rewriting. That will be a ways down the road though, because my focus is Dragons and Glass Slippers from last year. Which will hopefully have at least the first bit published in e-book form by next year. That's the goal. We'll see how much I actually get around to editing.
Friday, December 5, 2014
Thursday, December 4, 2014
Day 4: Negative on Negativity
I've been thinking about negativity a lot the last few weeks. Super fun, right? It has just been striking me especially hard when people around me are super negative and it makes me really sad. I've been lucky to be in community with a lot of people who are very positive. Not like super-bubbly, "life is sunshine and puppies," because that drives me nuts. More like realistic, "life is tough and it's not going to stop being difficult, but it's not going to get me down," sort of positivity. Which is the type that I really appreciate. Because it's what I try to live out in my own life, with varying degrees of success.
I personally believe that I get my positivity from my faith in God. After breaking from the overwhelmingly negative areas of Christianity (which I'll touch on in a second), I found that God is really pretty awesome and He's a victorious King who loved me so much that He chose me to be a part of His family. It's basically why I go to my church. That's the culture they encourage, and one where the punches aren't thrown. People will call you out on your issues, and they will do it in the most loving way possible. I know this because it just happened to me (again) this week. Twice. It's been an interesting time.
Being around that sort of attitude has apparently made me really sensitive to negativity, which is funny to me actually. I was that one kid who always used my brain as an excuse to be smarter than everyone else and call them dumb because I obviously figured out how you were doing everything wrong, so why are you having such a hard time with it? Of course I had no idea how to handle any of my own issues, so there was that. I posted a couple of times on my other blog about my struggles with mild depression, which got a huge boost when my sister and nephews were killed in a car accident a year and a half ago. That obviously rocked my life, and not in a good way. In a lot of ways it gave me an impetus to get myself in order, to figure out how to deal with my emotions more effectively. Because if I didn't, my world would collapse. I know because it did for a few months. It killed the job I did have because I could barely handle myself, let alone a couple of very taxing students (my main tutoring clients at the time). My attempts to find a new one were severely hindered, because again I could barely handle myself.
All of this made finding a way to stay positive in my life a matter of survival, not just something I should probably do sometime because it would make me a better person. And I'm saying this as someone who has definitely not figured out how to make it a daily part of my life. I definitely fail, pretty regularly, because it's very difficult to change years and years of mental pathways and a medical imbalance to boot. But at least I catch myself on it, or someone else will catch me on it (I mentioned that I got called out this week? Twice? Yeah, that's probably why this is on my mind today).
What I really wanted to do was encourage other people to catch themselves on it and make an effort to change their language. I've heard a bunch of people claim that scientific studies prove that the words that you speak have a physiological effect. I'm not a scientist (nor do I really want to be one, fascinating though it is), so I can't speak to the validity of those studies. But in my life, I can tell you that it makes a big difference. Even just this one thing that I often say to kids I'm working with, "you can make that choice but if you do you'll have to deal with the consequences." Or, like today when I was staring down a kid who was aiming a rubber band at me, "make a better choice." Stuff like that is just common sense when you're trying to teach kids to take responsibility for their own actions, but man is it powerful when it echoes in my own head when I'm alone and making choices that I know are not the greatest.
That's just one example. There are countless others. Saying positive things to yourself in the mirror. Which I'm still not great at... but I at least try to smile at myself, which is something. Making it a point to verbally affirm those around you. It's much harder if you don't already have that within you, which is in mind the biggest answer to the question: why do people hurt other people? Because they were hurt and they have had no one around them to help them heal it and bring them to a place of wholeness again. That's become my goal in life. To show people love, and hope that it makes them want to love others. Especially kids. Kids can carry so much hurt and they are usually physiologically incapable of processing it properly, but if you can get to them and show them the way out when they're young, the wounds heal better. Kids are resilient. It's one of the things I love about working with them.
I particularly would love to see positivity embraced within the Church. If you're not a Christian, and you're reading this, you're officially warned. This is where I put on my Bible Student/Teacher hat.
So Christians have this reputation for being super negative about life. And let's be honest, it's pretty well earned. We are the best at turning a great thing (like, say, salvation) and turning it into a terrible thing (guys, Jesus is awesome so obviously, we suck). Which is so not the way of it at all! Let's recap. Jesus is awesome. Yes. Okay, we're all on the same page here. What I believed for so long was that it meant that we are the worst of the worst, not because we are all sinners. Which is also true. I'm not refuting that. The part people seem to miss, that took me awhile to sort out was that God doesn't care. He sent Jesus anyway. Jesus died for us, of His own free will ANYWAY. And then said, hey, by the way, I'm going to redeem you and give you a pretty spectacular direct line to Me (the Holy Spirit) who will also give you a superior ability to change yourself so you can be more like Me.
What part of that is bad? What part of that is supposed to make us despair? The part where God loved us so much that He chose to wipe the slate clean for us? The part where He said that He knew we weren't up to the task of becoming more like Him on our own, so He sent us the Holy Spirit to be our Divine Help? The part where God adopted us into His family to share in the inheritance of Christ? Help me out here. I believed it for so long, and then I took a step back and actually listened to what I was saying. If it weren't for that, I'm not sure I could see how so many people could believe that we have not been given the best gift ever. Or how it could inspire so much negativity.
The most difficult thing about this revelation of the negativity in the modern Church, and getting free from it was... drumroll please! Not being negative about it! Seriously, this is the worst. Because I get back into that "I'm so smart and I figured this out, why can't everyone else just get on board" mentality, which is not great. Also, not at all helpful. I frequently have to remind myself that it was only His grace in my life that got me to this place, and it is a choice I had to make. I still have to make. I make it every day when I'm faced with situations that are tough. Remember I said at the beginning, the people I hang out with and learn from pull no punches. If life is tough they look it directly in the eye and introduce it to God, because He covers all. You don't hang around that a lot without it affecting your mindset. I intentionally keep myself in that company because I know that I need that influence in my life a lot right now.
Maybe that's why the last month or so the negativity of people around me has been particularly noticeable. I am still at the point where I make the wrong choice very often. Then I pray a lot and try and make better choices next time. But it's definitely an uphill battle, and when it's a part of your environment too it increases the grade of the slope a bit. On the other hand, I find myself thinking that I never want to have that terrible of an outlook on life, because I've been there and it's exhausting and defeating and all around not fun. It grieves me that I know so many people, particularly Christians, who cannot find enough good in themselves to be able to say good things about others. Who take any disagreement with their beliefs as a personal attack, and react defensively. Because obviously that public figure was saying "you suck" when they said "you might want to reconsider how you look at this."
For the record you don't suck. You're God's creation and He doesn't make anything that isn't good, and He loves you. I'll join you in the journey of ingraining that one truth into body, soul and spirit. Well, it's already in the spirit, via the Spirit. But you know what I mean.
"Therefore, there is then no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death." Romans 8:1-2.
"Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - His good, pleasing and perfect will." Romans 12:2
Fin
(For the sake of supporting my above arguments, read all of Romans 8 and 12, Philippians 4, and Matthew 6 and 7 where Jesus talks worrying and the good gifts of a Father. Also consider that the two greatest commandments listed in all the Gospels are Love God and Love others as yourself, and those two encompass the entirety of the Law and the Prophets. And that's just off the top of my head. There are others.)
I personally believe that I get my positivity from my faith in God. After breaking from the overwhelmingly negative areas of Christianity (which I'll touch on in a second), I found that God is really pretty awesome and He's a victorious King who loved me so much that He chose me to be a part of His family. It's basically why I go to my church. That's the culture they encourage, and one where the punches aren't thrown. People will call you out on your issues, and they will do it in the most loving way possible. I know this because it just happened to me (again) this week. Twice. It's been an interesting time.
Being around that sort of attitude has apparently made me really sensitive to negativity, which is funny to me actually. I was that one kid who always used my brain as an excuse to be smarter than everyone else and call them dumb because I obviously figured out how you were doing everything wrong, so why are you having such a hard time with it? Of course I had no idea how to handle any of my own issues, so there was that. I posted a couple of times on my other blog about my struggles with mild depression, which got a huge boost when my sister and nephews were killed in a car accident a year and a half ago. That obviously rocked my life, and not in a good way. In a lot of ways it gave me an impetus to get myself in order, to figure out how to deal with my emotions more effectively. Because if I didn't, my world would collapse. I know because it did for a few months. It killed the job I did have because I could barely handle myself, let alone a couple of very taxing students (my main tutoring clients at the time). My attempts to find a new one were severely hindered, because again I could barely handle myself.
All of this made finding a way to stay positive in my life a matter of survival, not just something I should probably do sometime because it would make me a better person. And I'm saying this as someone who has definitely not figured out how to make it a daily part of my life. I definitely fail, pretty regularly, because it's very difficult to change years and years of mental pathways and a medical imbalance to boot. But at least I catch myself on it, or someone else will catch me on it (I mentioned that I got called out this week? Twice? Yeah, that's probably why this is on my mind today).
What I really wanted to do was encourage other people to catch themselves on it and make an effort to change their language. I've heard a bunch of people claim that scientific studies prove that the words that you speak have a physiological effect. I'm not a scientist (nor do I really want to be one, fascinating though it is), so I can't speak to the validity of those studies. But in my life, I can tell you that it makes a big difference. Even just this one thing that I often say to kids I'm working with, "you can make that choice but if you do you'll have to deal with the consequences." Or, like today when I was staring down a kid who was aiming a rubber band at me, "make a better choice." Stuff like that is just common sense when you're trying to teach kids to take responsibility for their own actions, but man is it powerful when it echoes in my own head when I'm alone and making choices that I know are not the greatest.
That's just one example. There are countless others. Saying positive things to yourself in the mirror. Which I'm still not great at... but I at least try to smile at myself, which is something. Making it a point to verbally affirm those around you. It's much harder if you don't already have that within you, which is in mind the biggest answer to the question: why do people hurt other people? Because they were hurt and they have had no one around them to help them heal it and bring them to a place of wholeness again. That's become my goal in life. To show people love, and hope that it makes them want to love others. Especially kids. Kids can carry so much hurt and they are usually physiologically incapable of processing it properly, but if you can get to them and show them the way out when they're young, the wounds heal better. Kids are resilient. It's one of the things I love about working with them.
I particularly would love to see positivity embraced within the Church. If you're not a Christian, and you're reading this, you're officially warned. This is where I put on my Bible Student/Teacher hat.
So Christians have this reputation for being super negative about life. And let's be honest, it's pretty well earned. We are the best at turning a great thing (like, say, salvation) and turning it into a terrible thing (guys, Jesus is awesome so obviously, we suck). Which is so not the way of it at all! Let's recap. Jesus is awesome. Yes. Okay, we're all on the same page here. What I believed for so long was that it meant that we are the worst of the worst, not because we are all sinners. Which is also true. I'm not refuting that. The part people seem to miss, that took me awhile to sort out was that God doesn't care. He sent Jesus anyway. Jesus died for us, of His own free will ANYWAY. And then said, hey, by the way, I'm going to redeem you and give you a pretty spectacular direct line to Me (the Holy Spirit) who will also give you a superior ability to change yourself so you can be more like Me.
What part of that is bad? What part of that is supposed to make us despair? The part where God loved us so much that He chose to wipe the slate clean for us? The part where He said that He knew we weren't up to the task of becoming more like Him on our own, so He sent us the Holy Spirit to be our Divine Help? The part where God adopted us into His family to share in the inheritance of Christ? Help me out here. I believed it for so long, and then I took a step back and actually listened to what I was saying. If it weren't for that, I'm not sure I could see how so many people could believe that we have not been given the best gift ever. Or how it could inspire so much negativity.
The most difficult thing about this revelation of the negativity in the modern Church, and getting free from it was... drumroll please! Not being negative about it! Seriously, this is the worst. Because I get back into that "I'm so smart and I figured this out, why can't everyone else just get on board" mentality, which is not great. Also, not at all helpful. I frequently have to remind myself that it was only His grace in my life that got me to this place, and it is a choice I had to make. I still have to make. I make it every day when I'm faced with situations that are tough. Remember I said at the beginning, the people I hang out with and learn from pull no punches. If life is tough they look it directly in the eye and introduce it to God, because He covers all. You don't hang around that a lot without it affecting your mindset. I intentionally keep myself in that company because I know that I need that influence in my life a lot right now.
Maybe that's why the last month or so the negativity of people around me has been particularly noticeable. I am still at the point where I make the wrong choice very often. Then I pray a lot and try and make better choices next time. But it's definitely an uphill battle, and when it's a part of your environment too it increases the grade of the slope a bit. On the other hand, I find myself thinking that I never want to have that terrible of an outlook on life, because I've been there and it's exhausting and defeating and all around not fun. It grieves me that I know so many people, particularly Christians, who cannot find enough good in themselves to be able to say good things about others. Who take any disagreement with their beliefs as a personal attack, and react defensively. Because obviously that public figure was saying "you suck" when they said "you might want to reconsider how you look at this."
For the record you don't suck. You're God's creation and He doesn't make anything that isn't good, and He loves you. I'll join you in the journey of ingraining that one truth into body, soul and spirit. Well, it's already in the spirit, via the Spirit. But you know what I mean.
"Therefore, there is then no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death." Romans 8:1-2.
"Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - His good, pleasing and perfect will." Romans 12:2
Fin
(For the sake of supporting my above arguments, read all of Romans 8 and 12, Philippians 4, and Matthew 6 and 7 where Jesus talks worrying and the good gifts of a Father. Also consider that the two greatest commandments listed in all the Gospels are Love God and Love others as yourself, and those two encompass the entirety of the Law and the Prophets. And that's just off the top of my head. There are others.)
Wednesday, December 3, 2014
Day 3: Think of the Children!
First a quick note: My post from yesterday got chosen as a Best of Holidailies! Whoo hoo! Go check it out if you haven't yet!
Now to the main thing. I just started my new job as a staff member for Boys and Girls Club of Placer County, working in their after-school program at a school in Auburn. It's been a lot of fun, so far, though more exhausting than 4 hours has any right to be. That's mostly just because I'm out of practice both working and being around over a hundred other people, most of them small humans who at least partially look up to you (even though some of them are taller than me). The introvert in me is having a time of it adjusting, but it's only the first week and it will get easier.
The main reason I wanted to talk about this was because, 1) It is basically the main thing going on in my life right now, besides NaNo recovery which includes remembering what it's like to take regular showers; and, 2) I want to talk about how much fun it is to work with kids.
Seriously. It is a blast. I love it so much. I've been working with kids since I was a kid, it seems. As soon as I was at least a little older than the majority of the children at church, I was the one put in charge and ever since then it's just been a part of my life. I went through a period where I rarely worked with kids, focusing on school or work instead. It drove me nuts.
For awhile, that was sort of taken care of by living with a family that had the cutest twin 7 year old girls. Seriously. Being around those two was like a constant episode of "Kids Say the Darndest Things." I was reintroduced to tea parties, playing with Barbies, playing "gymnastics," taking walks in which rocks were the most fascinating thing in the world, and the joys of tickling. Also, they introduced me to My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, which is delightful. It got me through 5 very dark months (literally) working overnight shifts at a hotel. So did having them to play with in the afternoons when I was actually awake.
I also started working with the kids at church at the beginning of the school year, which is also great. It's so funny having conversations with kids who decide they are the president of United States and they are going to give an executive order speech to the rest of the kids, despite the fact that no one else is paying attention (can you guess what was going on in the world that week?). Or with kids who weren't even born when the first Pokemon games came out, telling you that they know EVERYTHING about Pokemon, which may be true in fact. I quizzed that kid on First Gen stuff and he acquitted himself well. I was certainly impressed. Or just conversations with kids in general.
That's what I've noticed in this new job so far. Conversations with kids require you to suspend reality somewhat, because you know that to get what they're saying on their level, you have to get on their level. And that is a level where a group of girls could really be descendants of Native Americans who were driven from their land after their parents were killed, even though they all look totally different from each other and minutes later start talking about what they're going to do with their parents when they get home.
It's just so much fun. I've been helping in the homework area, and watching a kid get it by themselves after you've talked them through it the last ten times is the best. Or on the playground, where I've already had little boys less than half my height school me in soccer. Or when I'm just hanging out with conversations, listening to the way their logic works. I love it.
I will probably end up with many more stories, or at least fun anecdotes over this month. From church and my job. Because they both have those kids who say things that are just spectacular. Also, those ones who think I'm crazy because I danced around a lot when we were making Christmas decorations and listening to Christmas music.
And now to get ready for work. Allons-y!
Tuesday, December 2, 2014
Day 2: Value
I think it's fair to say that most of this blog post will be written while I'm listening to this song, so it is probably worth mentioning. I love the Wailin' Jennys, no matter what song they are doing, but this one in particular is just a really calming version of this traditional song. Anytime they do acapella arrangements, I melt. So clean. Such tight harmonies. I'm in love.
That is not, however what this post is about. This is about an issue that has continued to pop up in my consciousness over the past few months. Incidentally, whenever it's popped up for me I've posted about it on Facebook, so if you've been following there you've probably heard me talk about it a little bit. I just haven't gotten really deep into my thoughts and opinions about it all.
What I'm talking about is simple: the issue of GamerGate, or more specifically, the role of females in the video game industry.
I'm not going to go into the whole historical record part of GamerGate, or anything like that. Other people have done it better, and if you Google it I can guarantee that you will find a number of news articles from reputable papers that get into it. I can't make such a guarantee on YouTube, where it's about 50% good videos from good sources and 50% "we hate you all so go die!" with a lot more profanity and stuff. So go in at your own risk. My take on the whole issue is this: People pointed out a legitimate issue, and a bunch of really immature people confirmed every freaking stereotype by getting butthurt and going after anyone who disagreed with them in some of the most damaging ways possible.
Now I'm coming at this issue from two ways: One, I was out of the world when this all hit the fan, and not really paying attention to anything besides survival so it's taken me awhile to sort out different opinions and formulate an idea on this. And I've watched a lot of Anita Saarkesian's videos (her being the main figurehead of the pushback against sexism in games and gaming communities). And I've watched a lot of videos and read articles by people about this issue. What hits me after all this is that this is not just an issue with gaming. I'm not even going to really talk about gaming that much here because frankly, that's been done and done again. What I'm going to talk about is the world of Sci-Fi/Fantasy and how that has in a way fed this.
I'd like to start by saying most of the examples of these injustices are from media that I love. They're great stories, written by great people, but they have flaws. If you show me a story without flaws I'll show you the dreamland you are certainly living in. Additionally, if you try to tell me that I shouldn't be reading something written by people who disagree with my core beliefs, I'll give you this look:
That is not, however what this post is about. This is about an issue that has continued to pop up in my consciousness over the past few months. Incidentally, whenever it's popped up for me I've posted about it on Facebook, so if you've been following there you've probably heard me talk about it a little bit. I just haven't gotten really deep into my thoughts and opinions about it all.
What I'm talking about is simple: the issue of GamerGate, or more specifically, the role of females in the video game industry.
I'm not going to go into the whole historical record part of GamerGate, or anything like that. Other people have done it better, and if you Google it I can guarantee that you will find a number of news articles from reputable papers that get into it. I can't make such a guarantee on YouTube, where it's about 50% good videos from good sources and 50% "we hate you all so go die!" with a lot more profanity and stuff. So go in at your own risk. My take on the whole issue is this: People pointed out a legitimate issue, and a bunch of really immature people confirmed every freaking stereotype by getting butthurt and going after anyone who disagreed with them in some of the most damaging ways possible.
Now I'm coming at this issue from two ways: One, I was out of the world when this all hit the fan, and not really paying attention to anything besides survival so it's taken me awhile to sort out different opinions and formulate an idea on this. And I've watched a lot of Anita Saarkesian's videos (her being the main figurehead of the pushback against sexism in games and gaming communities). And I've watched a lot of videos and read articles by people about this issue. What hits me after all this is that this is not just an issue with gaming. I'm not even going to really talk about gaming that much here because frankly, that's been done and done again. What I'm going to talk about is the world of Sci-Fi/Fantasy and how that has in a way fed this.
I'd like to start by saying most of the examples of these injustices are from media that I love. They're great stories, written by great people, but they have flaws. If you show me a story without flaws I'll show you the dreamland you are certainly living in. Additionally, if you try to tell me that I shouldn't be reading something written by people who disagree with my core beliefs, I'll give you this look:
Mostly because, let's be real, no one in the world actually agrees 100% with another person. And even if they mostly agree, it gets boring standing around patting each other on the back because you're both so right. So you eventually find something that you disagree about. I think I can safely point to a large portion of Christian culture to validate that statement. ANYWAY...
Going back to the Sci-Fi/Fantasy realm, which includes books, shows, movies, art, and any other form of media you can think of. I've been a fan of this for years, and I still am, but it doesn't stop me from looking around and seeing that women get the short stick for awhile. We who are fans of the revolutionary nature of cultural commentary of this genre love to point out that we rock at representing women. And I think in some ways we do. But can we really say that if part of our criteria is that we even involve women in the first place, and make them into real characters, not just set pieces? Some of the books that I can think of are remarkable simply because there were women. There were a whole lot more men, doing more epic things, but because we had a couple of women doing something valuable, it's a win.
Take Lord of the Rings. The books mostly, the movies did a bit better with it (which purists bemoan, whatever). I've spent a significant amount of time dedicated to this series, but the presence of women in it is negligible except for one main instance. "No man am I." Eowyn. Shield-maiden of Rohan. Total badass. She disobeyed orders to stay home and take care of the women and children, dressed up as a man to ride with her uncle's army, took Merry with her to make sure he got to where he needed to be, and in the end (with Merry's help) managed to slay the most powerful dark force in the battle, aside from Sauron. The Witch King of Angmar, the one no man could kill. She did. It was brilliant.
Aside from that, the presence of women in the books is minute. There's Arwen, who you only really see in Rivendell and at the very end. She mostly exists to give Aragorn something to fight for, given that she can only be with him if he accepts his rightful place as King of Gondor. Then we have Galadriel who is powerful, yes, but distant for most of the book, unwilling to use her power to do anything but protect Lorien. Though in fairness, that's a failing of the Elves in general deciding that the time was right for the Men to, well, Man up and take over Middle Earth so the elves could go back to the West. Every other woman is a minor character that shows up either in passing. And those three are pretty cool. But there are no less than 15 main male characters in this book who overpower the narrative of the books. Again, not that it's a bad book. I love it. I'm just pointing out that women are thin on the ground.
If you need any more proof on the Tolkien front, I'm pretty sure that Peter Jackson added Tauriel to the Hobbit movies just to get some gender representation in there. Which did the story no favors, but whatever. It's there. And I'd be willing to be that he'd get in trouble with a lot of people if he hadn't done that, even if the book purists would have been happier.
What about not Tolkien? There are some people who actually do really well, in my opinion. For instance, Lewis in the Narnia series. The whole story is initiated by Lucy, Susan plays a huge role when she's present, one of the main people responsible for Caspian's education in the Old Ways is his old nurse,, Aravis in Horse and His boy, and Jill who is great. There are a great number of female Animals who are big players. Of course, there's also the fact that the main villain is a Witch who frequently uses her "feminine wiles" to trick people. But there are also evil guys, not the least of which is Miraz who is the epitome of a evil feudal lord. So I think it sort of evens out.
It's funny to me that Orson Scott Card is one of the best writers when it comes to involving women in important and possible ways, in just about every book I've read of his. Being that he's a Mormon, who are great people, but not exactly known for their progressive cultural views. Others are not so surprising to me. Joss Whedon has established a great body of work that includes some of the best female characters. Tamora Pierce is my absolute favorite because of the work she does on this front.
The problem, as I think about it more, is not really within the content creators. At least not most of the contemporary ones. It's within the fans, who are many of the same people who are fans of video games, who complain about how women are overtaking everything in their quest to be heard. Which isn't true. We'd mostly just like to be represented. And with more than one character for every 5 male characters. My thoughts on women's place in culture are many and varied, and I'll probably touch on them again later, because we cannot all be Eowyn (as much as I want to, because she is really cool). For now the point I'm trying to make is that the firestorm of GamerGate is going to eventually have to reach the Sci-Fi/Fantasy world and change the way everyone writes women and thinks about how female characters are represented. I'm not even pulling for only strong female characters, which is what a lot of people seem to want. Because that's not necessarily real. Real is having some who are strong, some who are weak, but to portray them all as having value. That's what will change the world.
More on this later.
Monday, December 1, 2014
Day 1: Thoughts on Self-Regulation
Hey look, it's a blog! And Holidailies!
So enters Holidailies, one of my many attempts to get myself to write at least a little bit each day, for a month at any rate. The thing I like about this is the variety available. I can post links if my brain fails to function. I can talk about what I'm doing with my life, or what I'm not doing and would like to be doing. I could talk about what I'm watching and reading. So obviously I chose to talk about self-regulation.
Self-regulation. Sometimes better known as "responsibility" or "being an adult." This has been on my mind a lot. I've had a lot of personal failings in this area, if we're being entirely honest. When my brain doesn't want to cooperate, it's been very difficult for me to come up with ways to either trick it into wanting to or just out and out forcing myself to do things. It's also a matter of curbing the destructive habits that I've developed. It's one of those things I thought I was largely prepared for, being considered pretty mature for most of my life. After all, self-regulation is a large part of maturity, right? That's correct, and so I figured I was set. Except for the fact that I overlooked/purposefully ignored some pretty major weaknesses in that.
For instance, I can work for someone else. I can do things that I hate doing - cheerfully even! - if it's only for the benefit of someone else. Don't even have to be paid, I will still do it. Alas, my own personal internal motivation for things like chores is... shall we say lacking? That might be a little bit of an understatement. Let's be blunt. I'm terrible at chores in my own house. To the point where it drives me nuts, because I lived long enough with clean freaks that it now frustrates me to have things chaotic. But I look at, say, a pile of dishes and my whole mental process of cause and effect (cause: I don't wash the dishes; effect: they will grow things and smell) just shuts down. Taking out the trash? Fine. Making sure I make and eat food before it goes bad? Mostly fine, unless it gets stuffed in the back corner. Most things? Okay. If I fail, I get back up, find a different way, do better next time.
Except for those couple of things that just keep popping up. I don't even really know where I'm going with this. Other than to put it out and there and say, "hey, this happens and I can deal with it some days, and some days, like today, I have more trouble." I'm a little exhausted, and I have a headache, and I'm doing pretty good by writing, which is something I like to do.
But on the plus side, part of the reason I'm so tired is because I started my new job today! I woke up quite early (a large victory on the front of self-regulation) because I had to run some errands and get paperwork squared away before I went in to sign ALL the documents. And then of course the extra energy expended when it's a new place, and I'm suddenly surrounded by hundreds of people that I need to at least keep straight. Names will hopefully come. This week is going to be long though. I used to think that working with kids was easy, because it came naturally. Years of experience have taught me that working with kids is anything but easy, even if I love it more than anything. I'll probably end up going more into that later this month though. For right now, my head is telling me it's well past time to not be thinking deeply about anything.
Until tomorrow!
Saturday, November 29, 2014
The Beginning
Hello everyone! I'm here to introduce my new blog, just in time for the Holidailies season! Why a new blog, you ask? Why not just stick with the one I already had? Well, I thought about it, but I had a couple of reasons for it. My old blog, Yet Another Spot of Randomness was great when I started it. It was a way to test the waters, see if I liked this blogging thing. But let's face it, just the name alone is not the best. And after a few years of posting on and off, I realized that the name made it hard for me to take it seriously because I always wanted to make up for the fact that it seemed so casual and unfocused. Plus, I have grown up a lot since I started posting there, and so has what I write about. So I figured I would start a new blog, which is where you are. And what did I name it? Well, Ned the Duck of course!
So after all that about how I was growing up and wanted a blog to reflect that, why would I name a blog Ned the Duck? A very good question! The story goes like this: Those who have known me for awhile know that one of my dreams is to own a house with a backyard and a pond so that I can have a pet duck. Furthermore, I want to name it Ned. This all started when I volunteered at the County Fair for the benefit of my brother's Boy Scout troop and got assigned to work in the small animals area, where I caught ducklings and chicks for two weeks and proceeded to fall in love with them. The ducklings in particular. Since I was supposed to be selling them and answering questions on care, I ended up doing a good bit of research into duck care and was told how good of a pet they were, even if you just had a small backyard and a kiddie pool. At the time, I was hoping to move up to the Rocklin area and we were thinking about renting a house, so it almost happened to coincide with me getting a duck! Alas, plans changed and I ended up in a wonderful apartment that I loved, but with no room for said duck. So it became a dream that I hold onto, until such a time as my permanent living situation allows for a duck.
What does that have to do with a blog? Well, it's about my vision for this blog. There are a lot of things that I dream of doing, and one of them is writing about life in the most honest way that I can. Whether it be books or shows that I enjoy greatly, events and life changes that I'm experiencing, or just thoughts that knock around my head until I feel the need to tell others about them. Which is, of course the best way to spread my opinion! At any rate, it's a way and I like it.
Starting on Monday the 1st, I will be posting here every day, about whatever strikes my fancy. I have a couple of topics stored up from the year that I never got around to on the other blog, so I'll probably pull those out. And I'm starting a new job on Monday, working with kids. That will hopefully be the source of many an idea. So until then, have a good rest of your weekend everyone!
So after all that about how I was growing up and wanted a blog to reflect that, why would I name a blog Ned the Duck? A very good question! The story goes like this: Those who have known me for awhile know that one of my dreams is to own a house with a backyard and a pond so that I can have a pet duck. Furthermore, I want to name it Ned. This all started when I volunteered at the County Fair for the benefit of my brother's Boy Scout troop and got assigned to work in the small animals area, where I caught ducklings and chicks for two weeks and proceeded to fall in love with them. The ducklings in particular. Since I was supposed to be selling them and answering questions on care, I ended up doing a good bit of research into duck care and was told how good of a pet they were, even if you just had a small backyard and a kiddie pool. At the time, I was hoping to move up to the Rocklin area and we were thinking about renting a house, so it almost happened to coincide with me getting a duck! Alas, plans changed and I ended up in a wonderful apartment that I loved, but with no room for said duck. So it became a dream that I hold onto, until such a time as my permanent living situation allows for a duck.
What does that have to do with a blog? Well, it's about my vision for this blog. There are a lot of things that I dream of doing, and one of them is writing about life in the most honest way that I can. Whether it be books or shows that I enjoy greatly, events and life changes that I'm experiencing, or just thoughts that knock around my head until I feel the need to tell others about them. Which is, of course the best way to spread my opinion! At any rate, it's a way and I like it.
Starting on Monday the 1st, I will be posting here every day, about whatever strikes my fancy. I have a couple of topics stored up from the year that I never got around to on the other blog, so I'll probably pull those out. And I'm starting a new job on Monday, working with kids. That will hopefully be the source of many an idea. So until then, have a good rest of your weekend everyone!
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