Driving

Today was another caroling day, which is why I'm just now starting this post at 8:45 pm. Thankfully, this weekend and next I only have one gig a weekend.

Pros: I get to sleep in my bed every night, and my voice isn't nearly as trashed when I have to teach during the week.

Cons: 2 hours of driving, 20 minutes of finding parking (because this place is crazy busy every weekend), 30 minutes getting dressed and waiting for people, 3 hours of singing, and then another 2-2.5 hours back home depending on traffic and how long it takes me to get dinner. Long day.

One other pro though is that it gives a lot of time to think about things, time to process being a commodity I am otherwise really short on. So... does that mean I have something to write about? No, not really. Not more than little wisps of thoughts that didn't stick around long enough to become anything. Welcome to my brain on school.

I will try and start writing stuff down in notebooks this week. Maybe that will help break down this wall against deeper thought that I seem to have put up, perhaps out of survival after last month. Who knows?

Part of it is that I had a lot of beliefs shift and gain nuance, and I'm trying to sort out how best to express them. Part of it is that a lot of things this year were rough, and I'm still trying to figure out how to talk about the ones I'm even allowed to talk about. Part of it is I am having trouble even fully remembering things that I thought were super important to talk about two months ago, or a month ago, because so much has happened even in just that time to push it all out of the way. Thus, the wall. Which I will break done. Eventually.

But now I guess it's probably time to go to sleep so I'm not super groggy tomorrow morning when I'm trying to get work done.

Until tomorrow.